Archive for May, 2008

Women are using online dating websites in larger numbers then ever before.

Monday, May 12th, 2008

It is increasingly becoming more competitive to successfully attract and date women from online dating websites.  I have been dating women from online websites for over four years and I know exactly how to approach, communicate, and “close.”

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1.    Profile picture – find which picture receives the most favorable response.
2.    Profile characteristics – it’s not a good idea to lie about your height!  But you can change your religion, nationality (not too drastically), income, etc…
3.    Introduction / summary – humor, passions, and adventure attract women more then lame stories about your dog and inability to find love.  You need to sell yourself and entertain at the same time.

In my years of dating women online I have found that not all online dating websites are the same.  There are free online dating services, low cost online dating services, and premium services that provide an entirely different type of experience.  You need to determine if you are trying to meet women for fun, romance, long-term, short-term, swinging, or friendship before you decide which online dating service to use.  I have utilized over a dozen online dating services and would be happy to share with you the ones I have found to be the easiest to meet and “score” with women.

Please sign up below and I will gladly share with you all of my online dating methodologies and observations on which online dating websites work the best.  Please sign up below to learn more.  I will not send you spam and you can opt-out anytime.

If you don’t hear back from an “active user” of an online dating website, chances are you don’t know how to effectively communicate.

Monday, May 12th, 2008

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You can learn how to effectively interact with beautiful women that live in your city through online dating websites.  The average online dating woman will receive 35-100 emails and instant messaging requests a month.  Only 20% of the men contacting her will receive a response indicating an interest at a possible future encounter.  Are you one of the 80% of men that don’t know how to effectively communicate, portray, and entice women online?

Women will spend on average 3-12 hours a week viewing and communicating with men that solicit them through online dating websites.  There are systematic steps you can take to greatly improve your chances of enticing and meeting-up with multiple women every month.

The following are ten steps that can get you a woman from an online dating site right now:

1.    Online dating is a numbers game, the more women you approach the better chance you have of getting an offline date.  However, you want to automate your online dating activities to save you as much time as possible.
2.    Contact unattractive females to increase your confidence, dialogue, and socialization capabilities.
3.    Don’t ask for a telephone number, ask for a screen name, then talk on aol instant messenger, yahoo messenger, MSN, etc…  Once you talk on messenger for a short period, then ask for her telephone number.
4.    Don’t act immature.  Immature means making insulting comments regarding the persons profile, image, or writing.  You need to act 20% immature to effectively be humorous and generate self-doubt in the target.
5.    When asking for a telephone number, it should only be asked for when it appears a part of the natural dialogue of communication.
6.    Don’t just include a photo of your face.  Include action shots (driving a car, water skiing, hiking, snow boarding) and photos that demonstrate higher value (a photo of your fine Italian shoes – should not be an attempt at vanity).  Let the photo do all the talking, don’t boast.
7.    Make your doubt in her profile your attention grabber.  For example, in the subject heading write, “This user might be interested in talking with you.”
8.    A lot of women on dating websites are there for just entertainment.  The more you can entertain them, the better chance you stand of going out on a date with them.  Impressing them with your job, money, car, isn’t going to work.  You need to entertain them!
9.    Don’t show women from online dating sites your MySpace account.  It says you are “dorky” and wired into the internet.  Most women want a man that can walk away from the net on their date.
10.    Meeting up for a coffee might work with some girls.  But if you want to close, go out for appetizers and drinks.  Don’t waste money on a big dinner, instead, find a lounge that offers drinks and appetizers.

Online dating is becoming as competitive if not more competitive than traditional dating methodologies.

Monday, May 12th, 2008

I have been doing online dating for 5 years and I know what works and what doesn’t.

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Online dating vs. offline dating share similar characteristics and major differences:

Similarities:

1.    First impressions are based on looks
2.    Women are pursued, and men are the pursuers
3.    Humor can help build attraction
4.    The approach counts for 80% of future interaction
5.    It’s hard to maintain a relationship as they require a lot of work

Differences:

1.    The approach can be done in such a way that physical appearances play a much less important initial role
2.    History, interests, and characteristics can be studied before deciding to commit to interaction
3.    Women pursue men just as much as men pursue women
4.    Women are more open to interacting with you because of less peer pressure from friends and social norms don’t come into play
5.    Women on dating websites are there because they want to date! Women in bars and other settings are not necessarily there to date.

Finding love and interacting with the opposite sex is a difficult task.  Practice makes perfect, and most men don’t take the time it requires to master the social dynamic of interacting with women.  If you were devote every working hour to meeting, engaging, and closing women, instead of going to work and conducting business, you wouldn’t need help with dating.  Online dating can be the fast track method to meeting and picking up women you have been looking for.  However, there are differences from meeting women offline vs. online.  I know the five immediate steps you can take to start meeting and taking out women from online-dating websites.  Please fill out the form to the right if you are interested in learning more about how to successfully approach women online.

Learn how a DORK goes out with 3 attractive women a week though online dating websites.

Monday, May 12th, 2008

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I’m a dork, not that attractive, yet I still manage to go out on at least one date a week with a very attractive female that I meet through online dating websites.  The women that are on online-dating websites are full of self-doubt, tarnished relationships, and are indecisive as to what they are looking for.  That means the “average” guy can easily go out on multiple dates every single month.  There are thousands of women in your city looking to go out on dates any night of the week.  You simply have to take action and start approaching the many women in your city that are listed on dating websites.

The following is a quick action guide to start approaching women through online dating websites:

1. Step One: Introduction

Discuss why you think online dating works or doesn’t work.

2. Step Two: Mention something that stands out in her profile (humor, beauty, similarities)

You want your comment to be something that invokes an emotional response.  The emotional response should cause her to become defensive, but not upset or “turned off” by your comment.  A soft/sly remark is the best way to garner attention.  Make sure every email you send to each girl is targeted towards her profile.  After you create enough of these emails, you can start re-using them for similar situations.

3. Step 3: Tell her about yourself

One or two sentences here, make it quick and funny.  For example, if you are on a Jewish dating website, you might say, “I’m the Matzah king baby….will you be my Matzah queen?”

4. Step 4: Call to action

What you want her to do after reading your email?  For example, ask her, “If she was in Europe, what would be the thing she would want to see and do?”

5. Step 5: Sign off

Put your name, email, instant messenger account.  In the follow-up email you will want to include only your name and phone number.  Most likely the woman will email you back with just her name and telephone number.

The Sex and the City phenomenon

Monday, May 5th, 2008

This afternoon, I took part in a weekly tele-conference with some colleagues, where we quickly turned our conversation and heads toward everyone’s favorite topic: the upcoming Sex and the City movie.

It’s not just limited to the this group. Everyone, everywhere is obsessed. Last night, I went to a Yelp party, it was all we chatted about. Later, over sushi, the conversation continued. Friends are planning viewing parties and marathon nights of Magnolia and cosmos.

The culture of SATC though is something that reaches far beyond a film or a bag trend…we can’t ignore how the show has pretty much redefined dating as we know it. (Well, I especially can’t ignore, I am a sex editor, after all.)

The romantic collaborations and interventions that unfolded as the four Sex and the City gals hashed out their love lives over cosmos and brunch gave way to a new approach to dating for single women everywhere.

As this cultural milestone jumps from the small screen to the silver screen (movie premieres: May 30), we have to look back on how the show, and now the movie, I’m sure, changed the lexicon of love and dating.

“Sex and the City,” along with the introduction of dating reality shows like ABC’s “The Bachelor,” socialized dating. Suddenly everyone was talking about the dating choices others make, and learning vicariously through them. Was it OK to break up via post-it note? How young of a man can a somewhat older woman get away with dating? Who was really right for someone, and by what criteria? Dating choices became mainstream conversations in the workplace, at dinner parties and even among family members. Believe it or not, the word wasn’t always like that! This show didn’t just change how we dress and what we drink at bars, but how we live.

Interestingly, the Sex and the City social phenomena gave way to different types of online dating, as well. For instance, social dating communities exist where singles invite their friends to help them make romantic connections. They do this through dating suggestions, voting on possible dates, post-date debriefing and setting up introductions for each other. Also, coupled friends socialize among the singles, to match up their friends, who are looking for love. The idea of “social dating” is a much more “Sex and the City” approach, compared to traditional online dating, which is decidedly not social.

Something to think about as you embark on your weeks of SATC countdown: This is more than a movie premiere. It’s a culmination of the institution that changed everything.

Unrequited love

Sunday, May 4th, 2008

Unrequited love is frustrating and insecurity-building and self-defeating and yet, it seems to plague a great many of us.

We fall for friends, or acquaintances, or people we barely know, and then drive ourselves crazy waiting for them to want us back. We begin to think we love them, that we are meant to be with them, and then we look for hints.

Well, look at the way he looked at me. Or that thing he said in passing. His last hug did seem to linger a bit…

When do we know if we are for real, or just deluding ourselves? And how do we know if we are engaging in perseverance or we are just closing ourselves off from meeting someone else?

I’d love to learn about some of your experiences!

Dieting and dating

Friday, May 2nd, 2008

When you are on a first (or any early) date with a guy, if you are a girl, you just may be feeling self-conscious about what you are eating. But relax! Check these tips I found in an Village article on dieting while dating.

Dieting on a Date

Sure, he’s cute alright, but is a night out with him worth the diet detour? Don’t worry; you can find love and still lose those love handles by following a few, simple guidelines:

1. Relax. By exercising and eating healthy 80-90% of the time, you’ve earned a little room to splurge. It’s all about balance.

2. Don’t starve yourself before the big date—you’ll do more harm than good.

3. When it comes to ordering dinner, look for a good balance between protein, vegetables and starchy carbohydrates.

4. Mind the booze. Don’t let being anxious over Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome make you forget about your slim and trim summer wardrobe!

Dating smarts

Thursday, May 1st, 2008

How brave new world is this?

Apparently, there is a new entrant to the online dating scene - IntelligentPeople.com is a new online dating and networking community that gives intelligent people an opportunity to meet and form relationships, regardless of location, education and social status.

Note, the site gets to decide who they feel is intelligent!

Membership is intended for people with an IQ app. in the top 15% of the population. In comparison, you must have an IQ in the top 2% of the population to become a member of Mensa. People with an IQ in the top 15%, are said to be “highly intelligent”.

The concept behind this is highly intelligent people communicate and interact best with other intelligent people. IntelligentPeople.com was created on the basis of that fact. I’m not sure how I feel about this - it’s clearly a form of prejudice. What do you all think?

How do I become a member?
To become a member of IntelligentPeople.com, you will have to pass our IQ test required for admission. You may take the IQ test by pressing the join link at the front page. At the sign-up page, you must enter your name and email address. Following sign up, you will automatically receive an activation code in your inbox, and be able to start the IQ test. Please note that you can only sign up to take the test twice and only use each activation code once. This ensures that only people, who actually can pass the IQ test, become members of IntelligentPeople.com.